Nothing in my life fits together the way it should anymore, teachers have given up on me, my parents have given up on me...they never put me in a place where I could succeed...Every minute I spend with Chris brings me down evern more, it's akward the entire time and seems half right to be with him, and in the end I'm just more confused and upset...How in the fuck do you tell if someone cares...It's almost like I've lost my sense of reality, not the sense of my drunken Mother not knowing what she did 6 minutes ago, but I don't know what's wrong and right anymore, so I'm scared I'm believing what I want...not the truth...my friends that hate him insist that he's just useing me for whatever reason that could be, and my other friends say he just wouln't admit to caring...Why does he have to be so fucking complicated?...Half of me just wants to fall asleep until school is over, just a week, I could do that...right? Ughh...I better go nap or something before I get more stupid hurtful thoughts, atleast the dreams hurt less when you wake up. <3 Maremo